Bluebird's Delusions
by Tterit
Summary: He might be deluding himself, but he didn't care. He just wanted to see his brother smile again. Post Veggie!Ed, Bluebird's Illusions. Hints of Edwin. Rated T for slightly depressing content, kind of.


**Hello! Back with more depressing stuff! Just finished reading (yes that's right, reading) Bluebird's Illusion and it was actually pretty interesting. If you don't know what Bluebird's Illusion is, scroll down to my other author's note and I'll explain.**

* * *

Al smiled at his older brother, half expecting Ed to smile back. Wouldn't that be the day? Certainly the day of Alphonse Elric's very dreams. Just one little smile could make the pieces of his world fit together once again. But no, even though the sun was shining brightly above them and the sound of birds chirping was ricocheting through their ears, Edward was like stone. He starred blankly at something in the distance, something that Al couldn't even see, or if he could, then it must not be something worth starring at for so long. It was like his brother was in a different world, and maybe he was. He hoped, for his brother's sake, that it was a good world. Maybe Edward was smiling in that world.

Al closed his eyes. He couldn't take it anymore. He couldn't stand looking at his brother and not having him look back. Shame coursed through his body. His brother was still there, he needed to stop acting like he wasn't. He had to get over himself. Edward had sacrificed himself so that Al could live. He wouldn't want Al to live a miserable existence like this. He had to cheer up.

One of the cats ran out the open door of the house, Den ran after it barking, though Al doubted that he'd do it any harm. The kitty quickly ran behind Al's legs, trying its best to hide from the dog. Al scooped it up in one hand and carefully ran his other hand through its soft orange fur. It purred gently, feeling a bit safer in his care. Al glanced back at his brother, who was still seated on the old dining chair he'd placed outside for him. It was ironic really, Ed had an automail leg and it still didn't help him walk a bit. No amount of automail in the world would be able to get him to walk again. He was like a lifeless rag doll. A rag doll, that Alphonse loved more than anything else in the world.

Al walked a bit closer to Ed, and slowly placed the feline on his brother's lap. The cat tried to jump off, but Al stroked its back with his finger, calming it down and making it stay still. Had Ed not been off in the ozone, Al had no doubt that he would have screamed at him to get this dang monster off of him, but he continued sitting there, evidently not even aware of the living creature sitting on him.

"Brother…" Al whispered, trailing off. He wasn't sure what to say. He always tried to make conversation with Ed, praying that his brother could hear him somewhere in his heart, but today he was just tired. He was sure that Ed would understand that, Ed had always been tired. He wondered if Ed was still tired, but then again, Ed slept a lot lately. Al liked when Ed slept though, if Ed was sleeping he could convince himself that things were perfectly normal. Ed was just sleeping, and he'd wake up soon. He'd wake up and Al would tell him breakfast is ready. They'd get in an argument about milk over breakfast and then they walk to Central Headquarters together. After that Ed would get to work and Al would go grocery shopping.

He hadn't realized how good things had been then. He hadn't realized that those little pings of pains in his chest could lead to such pure sorrow. It shouldn't be this way. Never. He wanted to cry but he couldn't. If he cried every time he got the urge to, he'd be drowning. He had to keep moving on. For both of their sakes. And if he had to, he'd carry Ed onward with him. One step at a time.

Winry stepped outside, clapping her hands and calling for Den. He bounded over to her, forgetting about the kitty entirely. After closing the door, leaving Den trapped inside, Winry moved closer to the brothers. She smiled at Al, and lifted her hand above her eyes to block out the sun. "Good morning, Al," she whispered. She slowly craned her neck, so that her eyes matched up with Ed's golden ones. "And good morning, Ed."

"Good morning, Winry," Al replied. Of course, he was the only brother to return her greeting, and even though she knew that'd be the case she still felt a jab of melancholy.

"Geez it's hot…" Winry whined, "I wonder if Ed's hot..."

Al glanced back at his brother who was still in his long sleeved pajamas. He sighed, "You're probably right…" He picked up the kitty again and handed her to Winry, before lifting his brother off the chair, carrying him by his legs and his back. He had a wheelchair for Ed, but he didn't like it. Carrying his brother was just easier most of the time. Unless Al was taking Ed somewhere other then the house, then it wasn't necessary. Ed wouldn't have liked the wheelchair either; it wasn't his style to be confined to something like that. Besides, Al was terrified that if he left his brother in the wheelchair for too long he'd never get out of it and walk again. At least, if Al carried him he could delude himself into thinking it really was just temporary.

He moved his brother back into the house and set him on his bed. He quickly unbuttoned the pajama top and slipped a plain back t-shirt on him. He changed his pants too, putting shorts on his brother so that he would feel more comfortable with the weather. Of course, none of them had a clue if Ed would even care about something like that. For all they knew, Ed was like Al had been when he was a suit of armor, and he didn't feel a single thing. He hoped that wasn't the case though, and besides, Ed had to at least look presentable. Al couldn't have him lounging around in his pjs all day.

"There you go, brother," Al mumbled, smiling as he sat down on the bed next to Edward.

After a few minutes of pure silence, Winry walked into the room. She held a piece of paper in her hand and she was starring down at it confused. "What is this?" she asked, frowning.

"Huh?" Al questioned, standing up and walking to her side, "What do you mean?" He gazed over her shoulder and quickly forced a fake cough before snagging the paper from her. "Uh…oh wow, a letter from the Fuhrer!"

"Yeah…interesting…What's he saying about Ed?" Winry asked, glaring at Al, "He's glad that Ed's smiling again? What the heck…" She paused, noticing Al's worried expression.

"It's just…I didn't want him to worry too much…" Al whispered, glancing back and forth between Ed, the letter, and Winry.

"Didn't want him to worry? What about you Al? Lying will just make things harder on yourself, and that's the last thing you need!" she shouted, closing her eyes and slowly trying to calm herself down.

"It's alright, Winry. I'm not lying that much; sometimes Ed looks like he…might be smiling." Crap, now he was lying to Winry. This was wrong, he needed to stop this.

"Al…" she said, her voice pained and heavy. This was…Why would he lie about something like that?

"Winry, it will be okay. He…he might smile soon! I'll just keep waiting! And once he does, then it will okay! I won't be lying anymore! I'm sure that it will happen! For now though, Fuhrer Mustang has enough on his plate…" Al replied, smiling at her, he sat back down next to Ed, and grabbed his brother's hand. "It'll definitely happen!"

Winry allowed a single tear to wash down her cheek. She let herself cry far too often. Some might consider her weak, heck if Ed was still Ed then he might make fun of her for it, but it was the only way for her to deal with things. Her emotions were too strong to keep bottled up, and she didn't understand how Al could. "Let's hope so, Al…"

She closed the door behind her as she left the room. She left Al sitting next to Ed, letter in hand. As she walked away she could hear him reading it aloud, commenting on parts, talking to himself, or perhaps his imaginary friend, his imaginary friend named Edward Elric. The real Edward Elric certainly couldn't hear him. Even if they hoped with every fiber of their beings, he still wouldn't be able to hear them.

Winry found Pinako in the dining room, unaware of what had just transpired between her and Alphonse. She wasn't in the mood to talk, wasn't in the mood to let her grandmother see her cry, for the millionth time. So, she silently crept back outside, and let the bright sun engulf her.

* * *

Nighttime struck Resembool like a thick, star filled bulldozer. Al sighed, sitting down on the ground at his brother's feet. He glanced up at his Ed and grinned. "I wonder if there's any firefly grass out here…"

"_Firefly grass? Seriously Al? You think some pretty little plant will help me hear you…get real," _he could almost hear Edward grumble.

"Well it's worth a shot…" Al mumbled as he leaned back and starred up at the stars.

"_No falling stars for you to make a wish on…?"_

"Nope, I'll have to stick with hoping for now, I guess…" Al replied, addressing the comment that was never really uttered.

_Ed rolled his eyes, "Hoping? Geez, that won't accomplish anything, Al! Quit moping around and get to it!" _

"Get to what?' Al wondered, despite being the one who had actually had the thought in the first place.

_His brother paused, as if thinking it over. He blushed, looking tongue- tied. "I don't know, Al! Whatever you want to get to! Just stop being such a sad- sack, you're bumming me out…" _

"Do you think that…if I get to it, I could make you smile again?" Al questioned, turning his eyes from the stars to his brother's golden eyes.

"_Pssh, seeing you get off your lazy butt could get anyone smiling." _

"Brother! I've just needed some time to relax!" Al shouted, suddenly jumping to his feet and throwing his arms down to his sides in a huff.

From an outside point of view, this one-sided conversation might seem coated in pure insanity. But even if it was ridiculous and crazy, Al needed it. He needed to play these little games of pretend in order to keep playing the game of life. Part of him even wondered if maybe, Ed was involved in these modest talks after all. Maybe Ed was sending his thoughts to him just like he'd said he would, and maybe Al was sending them right back. After all, they didn't need firefly grass to feel each other's thoughts. Right?

He might just be deluding himself even more by considering such things. But, they were bluebird's illusions.

* * *

**Pointless, I know, but I had to write it anyway. I needed a break, so I wanted to write a one-shot.**

**Anyway, for those of you who don't know what Bluebird's Illusion is, this fanfiction will probably make no sense to you, so you probably shouldn't read it…Unless you already have…Bluebird's Illusion is a fan-made visual novel. There were only ever one-hundred copies made (because of copyright issues) and it's in Chinese! Yay! Right? I was curious about it, so I read the English translation, which is simply words and pictures, kind of reminds me of a fanfiction actually, except with beautiful art. I really want to play the game, but I can't speak Chinese and there isn't an English patch. I think that there's a group working on one, but I'm not sure if they're still doing it or when it will be done…**

**The game is super depressing, and also super confusing. It was made half-way through the manga, so the creators didn't really know a lot of the facts yet, they made Hohenheim and Father be the same person in it…So yeah, I only understood about half of it, but ah well. It was interesting, I especially enjoyed the ending that this was written about, Veggi!Ed ending, but Pride!Ed ending was good too. Although there were a few yaoi hints in it though…sorry yaoi shippers, but I'm not one of you, so that kind of upset me, but it was only brief hints that you could interpret as not being yaoi, so I just interpreted them that way…**

**Ehh, that was a long rant…Now for the people who've actually played/read Bluebird's Illusion. If there are actually any of you out there still…I know that I just found out about the game yesterday. Anyway, I hope that you guys enjoyed this and if enough people review then I have like a million more Bluebird's Illusion fanfictions I'm thinking about writing, so just review and tell me that you'd like to see more and maybe I'll write more. I'm thinking about writing one where Roy comes and sees that he's been lied to, or a Pride!Ed fic, where Winry meets Pride!Ed. **

**Please review, thanks! **


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